Tim Neal. (Friend and fellow endurance cyclist - These words meant a lot and still do).
So here I am. Again. The start of the journey. This journey. Not to Taupo. No. In a year I would sometimes rather look beyond - Last year - As painful as it was at times, I took the time to learn. It would be fair to say I have a new outlook. A new approach. Taupo then can wait - As it should - 'Taupo' will remain (for me) to be multiple laps of the Great Lake. This task needs completing first.
If the time trial is the 'race of truth', then the velodrome is the 'moment of truth'. No excuses, no BS, and no room for ever looking beyond the next 20 yards of track. Living in nothing more than right now.
This outing was not the first on the velodrome this season, but it was not taken lightly. "Hit the numbers or walk away", I thought as I looked down the track. Lightly then, I pedalled towards the white line…and wound it up. It was like taking off. Like the first two lengths of a swim session, when you are flying, and everything is effortless, and even breathing is simply done out of habit. Yes. Like swimming. Only better.
The day would choose to be a moderately windy one, but this would simply mean a greater effort. So it would be then, that I would drift away, into my place where focus meets unfixed attention - Where my thoughts roam. Among my wonderings was the scenario of a truck crashing into the velodrome's stadium. This was followed by the obvious question, "Is there enough space for the fire appliance to drive onto the track, with me still having enough room to continue the laps??". It turns out I do - In my mind at least. On this ride.
The last 30 minutes then. And nicely timed, a groundsman is trimming the grass verge of the velodrome, then blowing the cuttings off the track. I passed him 18 times before he finished. Not that the figure means anything. The important numbers had been ticked off. With thoughts of being pleased leaving me after a short while, and my only thought as I finished the ride being, "What can I do to go faster??".
So it would be then - In the year 2012 - my journey would be continuing. If I am prepared to hit the numbers, then this goal remains realistic.
One key difference between this year and the last is this - My world is a section of track 20 yards ahead of me for 24 hours. That point will not escape me this time. Not caught up anymore than needed in what happens before or after. Not caught up in the hype. Not caught up in anything that removes my gaze from that small section of asphalt. No. One focus.
So laid bare then. It's not about laps or kms or records or legs being sore or being the best. It is about staring ahead and knowing that if I slow down, then everything is gone. That is the purpose - for one day to have no yesterday and no tomorrow - only right now. And once again. Living.
Finally then, it dawned on me nearer the end of a ride the other day, that this journey is not in fact the start. That was in 2005. When I truly started. Clueless and overweight. And yet even then I was supported by others. This is for you then - This is for everyone who got told they couldn't do it, for everyone who woke up feeling fat and later heard a throwaway comment that confirmed it, and everyone who has been out cycling and needed encouragement - but instead simply saw a motorist flip the bird in your direction. Yes. This is for you. My words of advice are simple, but read them twice - "There is always hope".
No Stopping
On and on - Focused.
Eating this road before me.
I am the Pac Man.
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